I am not Superwoman. My son’s nickname in school was Superman, I have a Superman shirt and I love the song Kryptonite by 3 Doors Down but I have to realize I am not Superwoman – I simply cannot do all things for all people at all times. You have no idea how difficult that is to actually say out loud and even put into words. Girls will get this, guys will not.
Let me explain a bit of girl-world for you gentleman readers: we think, for some unknown reason, that we are supposed to be able to take care of every need, every whim, of every person who is in our life whether they be family members or a person we seen in the drug store which we had never seen before. We prioritize things in this manner: children, significant others, job, extra-curricular activities, distant relatives, strangers, world causes, self. In that order. For some strange reason we feel like we have to be able to do it all or we are less of a woman. Welcome to girl-world! Now do you see why we are a bit crazy sometimes? Cut us some slack, it is something that we can’t even explain.
Well today I made the proclamation that I cannot do it all – and even took it a step further – I asked for help. I have a long list of contract of which I need to get a hold of and I was feeling very overwhelmed at this prospect. Almost afraid of it, honestly. So I asked Jake this morning if he would go through each one, write down a synopsis and what I need to do next. I logged him in, showed him the the system and left him alone.
Guess what, I got two resumes done while he worked on this list and had a big weight lifted off my shoulders. He came into my office, briefly updated me, showed me his notes and said, “Not too bad, you got this.” And with that not only did I get a great handle on everything but I got encouragement to boot.
Sometimes when you are honest with yourself and allow yourself to let go and not take responsibility for every aspect of everyone’s life and ask for help, you find it. Sometimes it is right in front of you but you never allowed it to be there for you. I will admit that normally I would probably not have asked Jake to help because I would feel like I would have to over-explain everything – control issue. If I were really honest with myself, which seems to be a theme today, I would be too embarrassed to let him see that I let things get a little out of hand.
Jake did a great job, I can read his writing, he did wonderful at summarizing everything and has given me a huge leg up for a Monday He made no judgments, communicated clearly and was quite happy to help. Pretty good assistant, and he works cheap.
So today, let go a little be brave and ask for help. It might just make things easier than you could have imagined. And in admitting that you cannot do it all and allowing someone to do something for you will not, contrary to our absurd thought process, cause the sky to fall or life to end as we know it. It may just give you a boost of energy and shot of confidence to tackle those items on your list that justifiable need to get done and are within your powers to do so.
Say it with me, “I could really use your help…..”
Lisa K. McDonald, CPRW
Career Polish, Inc.