I attended a wonderful event this morning with the main point of the presentation to be truthful about who you are, transparent as to where you are and once these two have been satisfied decide if you are ready to make necessary changes. I loved it. I am all about self-truth and I think being a very straight-forward person it is natural to me; and it is helping me learn to just cut to the chase and take things for face value. I think this is my lesson right now – taking things as they are not as I over-analyze them to maybe be. Welcome to girl-world.
Anyway, after the event I was talking to a friend of mine who is also single and she was telling me about meeting an old friend for drinks. They had dated in past lives but the timing was never quite right. She said it was a lovely evening and she was so surprised that he remembered so much of their dating history, even made this comment to him, to which he replied, “Oh, I remember everything about us.”
He was not trying to rekindle anything as he was married and she made that very clear, but after her narration of the evening I simply responded, “So, he’s married and happy, but knows that you guys still click so if something happens the door might still be open. Bullshit.”
I see this a lot in job world. People are very content where they are; however, they start putting little feelers out there just to see if there is anything better. The first thing I would have to say is that they are not truly happy where they are or else they wouldn’t be having a wandering eye. Self-honesty. So if you are having a bit of a wandering eye the first thing you need to do is to be honest and admit if there is something lacking, if you are truly happy.
Career-wise I do not think this is always a bad thing to do a bit of feeling out. Sometimes it is necessary to take a look at what else is out there to truly realize you really do have it made just where you are.
Sometimes there is something missing and we just can’t put our finger on it and this looking about helps give some clarity. With this information you have two options: you could jump ship – or – you could bring these items up at your present location to see if you can get what you need right where you are.
I do offer a word of caution about checking out the rest of the market – it can backfire. If your current company discovers that you have been wining and dining others they may question your commitment. This could lead to an unfortunate set of circumstances.
Also, the ones that are wooing you may not make good on the promises or what is presented does not actually match up with reality. If you do jump ship you may find yourself on the Titanic rather than a lovely sailboat.
Think long and hard before you begin to take any action to “keep your options open”. Just remember the grass isn’t always greener on the other side. And as job searching is similar to dating and employment is similar to marriage let me tell you – women don’t like being the back up plan, it just never ends well.
Lisa K. McDonald, CPRW
Certified Professional Resume Writer
Career Polish, Inc.