Someone very close to me just started a new job a few weeks ago. Although excited about the opportunity she remained cautiously optimistic about the new gig. Turns out it just keeps getting better and better; the people are professional and like minded, the work is rewarding and the environment is supportive and team-oriented.
I had a client that changed jobs and the manner in which it was presented sounded very similar to what I described above. Turns out the company should have been named “Oz” as shortly after employee starts the curtain comes down and trust me, many are tapping their heels wishing, “There is no place like home…”
Opportunities are never completely what we expect them to be, for that matter neither is life. Thank goodness!
As much as anyone else I realize good and bad things happen in life – oh, I’ve got that lesson down; however every event is necessary in your life to help create the person that you are, or want to become. The difference between those two is if you choose to participate.
As anyone who reads my blogs knows I’m an example kinda girl, let me use one here.
I have a friend whom I love dearly, although if you would have seen us recently you would not have known it because I literally smacked him in the back of the head. Honestly I couldn’t help it, I was just trying to emphasize my point – which was participate or shut up.
Here’s the story, he’s crazy about a girl; like little things throughout the day remind him of her, laughing out of the blue because he is remembering something she said, thinking about her all the time kind of crazy. Sounds good – right? Yeah, well it would be if he weren’t being an ass. Once he realized he was, dare I say it, “falling for her” he started pushing her away. Just for bonus points I want it noted I did not smack him at that time.
But I’ve been on this little journey with him the entire time although the lady in question is not privy to our conversations so I really have no idea what her thoughts are; however she’s no longer as responsive to him as she once was. So in hearing him talk about how upset he is with situation I asked why he pulled back; the answer: “I don’t want to get hurt.” Smack.
She’s not your ex, she’s not anyone you have dated before and for goodness sakes where is it written that every great person is going to stomp on your heart? Oh, yeah, being without this awesome person is so much better than taking a chance and NOT getting hurt – smack.
That’s life – deal with it. Sometimes Prince Charming is a pig in Armani, sometimes jobs stink, sometimes those wonderful opportunities end with a big old thunk. And sometimes they are even better than you hoped for, they exceed your expectations in every possible way.
How will you know if it is going to be a thunker or a golden opportunity – you don’t; but you will know 100% for sure that it won’t work if you don’t give it a try. Fear is natural and sometimes a necessity for survival. The rest of the time we give it too much power. It is time to take your power back!
Pain, rejection and a whole array of negative experiences have helped me throughout my life; I’ve learned to embrace my thunks. They allow me to be a trusted advisor and resource for my clients; a rock for my kid; a better partner for the right person; a more open friend and a happier and giving person overall. I refuse to let a thunk kick my ass.
If the opportunity ends in a thunk guess what – you are still going to be around the next day to lick your wounds, reflect on your lessons and put that one foot in front of another. Please just try once to stand up to that fear that is facing you in the mirror and tell them who is boss. If it thunks instead of letting that voice tell you “I told you so” look it square in the eyes and say, “Lisa told me to – go talk to her!” and try again.
Lisa K. McDonald, CPRW
Certified Professional Resume Writer
Career Polish, Inc.