A client said this to me the other day and I have to admit I was a little stunned. When it was followed by:
“But it isn’t my fault”
I was right back on track.
Of course not. Sorry, a bit of sarcasm came out there. Now to be fair sometimes you can have a string of bad luck – I will give you that. I have had clients that have had a few jobs in a row that downsized shortly after they arrived due to one reason or another. That stinks but is easy enough to explain.
But when a series or two turns into an entire season then there might just be a problem and it isn’t the other teams. There are two ways this can happen but both of them center around you.
The first is you are going after the wrong jobs. They are not right for you either in skill level or in fulfilling you so they ultimately end badly. It is like dating. If you keep going out with the psycho chicks or bad boys you are not going to get that everyday happiness that you really desire.
Sometimes we set our sites too low because we are afraid to fail at something we really want. You may succeed at these other jobs but you are always left unfulfilled so ultimately a resentment or boredom takes over and ruins it resulting in a bad relationship.
What is the worst that could happen if you try for that really good job? They fire you? Been there done that so you know you can survive that, so really, what is holding you back? Why not try for something different – you have two options: succeed or fail. Take out the emotions and look at it logically – you have a 50/50 chance here; but your odds are increased if you actually put some effort in it and continue to try to learn and grow within the position. If you chicken out you have a perfect record – 100% failure.
The second way you may be failing at every job is that you are unwilling to adapt. If you refuse to modify your methods, attitude or skills to fit the position then you will not add any value. If you do not add value there is no reason for a company to keep you on board.
Something may have worked for you in the past but that does not mean that it will always work for you. People, situations, companies and industries change – you have to learn to grow within your abilities to grow with them.
If you see a pattern developing and you don’t like the way it looks then you need to first need to look at yourself. Are you setting your sites too low? I love the quote that says that the failure isn’t that we set our sites too high but rather we set them too low and reach them. Are you settling for something less than you want or deserve? Stop it. Recognize that you are a person of value and deserve to be happy and feel as though you are making a real contribution. Don’t half-ass your life – it is the only one you have so stop it.
Well, unless you believe in reincarnation, but then from what I understand there is no guarantee what the next round might be so you might as well make the most out of this one.
When you look at yourself do you find that there are common themes in past reviews – for example lack of communication, commitment, team work etc? Are you being unwilling to grow or modify your skill set? Do you see that it is not helping you?
Of course there is another option: you have picked the wrong line of work. I had an assistant in the financial industry that said she wasn’t good with math, or a client that was in sales that said he didn’t like calling on people he didn’t know. These are pretty good indicators that they have chosen the wrong field – rethink this.
What do you like to do, what are you good at, what do you want, how do you want to feel at the end of the day? These are all questions you should be asking if you are having a bit of a crises or conflict in your career.
Once you answer these then take a look at your history and see how you have helped yourself and also how you have hurt yourself. Then, forgive yourself and move on. You can’t change the past so there is no reason on beating yourself up over it. Decide to actually do and go after what you want then do it. You deserve it. It may be scary but the rewards are well worth the risks.
Lisa K. McDonald, CPRW
Certified Professional Resume Writer
Career Polish, Inc.