Learning something new – we look at those around us to see if we are doing it like they are to make sure we are doing it “right”.
The problem with this is too often we then set our goals and expectations based upon others around us rather than what really works for us.
They may be happy performing a task at a sub-par level – is that really your style?
The easiest way to determine if you are doing something “right” is to look at the results. Are you getting the results that you want? If not, then you probably are not doing it “right” for you.
Job searching, networking, business building, relationships or even just clearing out clutter – it is important to know what your goals are and how you will measure success.
That is a key point there: know how to measure success. If you can’t define it then how will you ever know if you achieve it?
My best friend Jackie and I have set goals to clean out clutter. Now, the great thing is we are identical twins so in developing our rules (systems) it was easy for us to discuss, determine, articulate and evaluate not only the process but what success will be for both of us.
We started with the goal. From there then we could break down the actions, behaviors and attitudes to determine what we were doing which supported the goal and what we needed to modify and actually put in place to support reaching that goal.
Now, as we work room by room we can actually measure our success based on what our expectations and goal is, that we set from the beginning.
We also realize that we cannot look at anyone else to compare to because quite frankly they are not us. I honestly do not know anyone else that has five dogs so I have to incorporate that into my plans, actions and processes. It would be unfair of me to compare myself to someone with no pets or children to my plan. Apples and oranges.
Jackie has two teenagers who excel academically but work their little buts off to do so, as well as very active in multiple sports. Part of her plan has to be incorporating not only their schedule, the actual physical elements (sports/school equipment), time considerations but also the fact that she gets up every morning to fix them a nutritious breakfast and pack healthy snacks for them to have after school before practice and then again a very healthy balanced dinner in the evening. She is the mom I want to be when I grow up.
When devising our plans we identified how they would be different given different circumstances. She’s got two little mess makers in the mix so that had to be incorporated into her plan; but not mine.
When determining a goal for yourself this year, this quarter or even this week make sure you do two imperative steps:
1. Defining what success will look like. If you find yourself coming up short then you can make appropriate changes because you will have something to measure against.
2. Do not define your goals, actions or success based upon someone else. This is your goal so therefore it is all about you – stop looking for validation from anywhere else.
Remember – you are the one who is going to be doing the happy dance once you achieve your goals – make sure you pick the music you like dancing to and not someone else’s play list.
Lisa K. McDonald, CPRW
Certified Professional Resume Writer
Career Polish, Inc.