You have all the right tools, knowledge and ambition yet you still can’t reach that goal. Whether it be landing the right job or client – it just seems out of reach. So what are you missing?
It may not be a question of what you are missing, rather what you need to subtract.
If you feel you have all the right pieces put in place take a look at your personal environment; more specifically the people in your environment.
Do you have a bunch of Debbie Downers or Doubting Thomas-es? Do the people around you invite you in with their energy, make you laugh, support you, inspire you and just generally make you feel good?
Have you ever heard the phrase you become the people you associate with the most? There is a bit to that, you know.
If you are surrounded by “poor me” and “it will never work” attitudes you are naturally going to get the happy, positive, encouragement and quite frankly life sucked right out of you.
One person is probably not going to represent all the above mentioned positive qualities. It is the lovely combination of unique individuals in your life that bring in the sum whole of a can’t-fail environment.
If you have ever read any of my blogs or know me personally then you know about my main support system:
Jackie: my bestest friend, confidant, twin, co-conspirator and kicker-in-the-butt.
Jake: my son, the center of my world, the one that can make me the most proud and most angry in a matter of seconds, the young unrecognized philosopher and the one that keeps me centered.
Jeff: a best friend who has known me for a quarter of a century, the one that sees the world in black and white, point A to point B and keeps me on my toes by always allowing for another viewpoint.
My parents: my dad who passed 18 years ago but impacted me, along with my grandmother, more than any other person in my life, my mom who supports me by allowing me to make my own way and Jim, my step-dad who brings balance to the very strong-willed women.
But there are many others that I can’t possibly go into, friends and family that give something of themselves to me through their friendship for which I am eternally grateful.
One of those friends is Frank.
Frank and I grew up in the same neighborhood with him being a year (or so) older than I but his brother and I were in the same grade. Talk to anyone in my town and just say “Frank” and they knew exactly who you were talking about – not Frank who or which Frank – there is only one Frank.
He is, in a word – infectious. His laughter, smile, wit, intelligence and amazingly positive attitude about life and appreciation for each and every day. Frank is the guy that men instantly bond to and women fall in love with – yes, Frank is that guy. Because he radiates life.
Here is the thing about Frank, it is not just that he makes you feel good when you are around him; he is inspiring.
Frank doesn’t have goals. Frank has missions. Come hell or high water if he sets his mind to something he is going to do it, and by God, do it well.
When I talk to people who bemoan that they can’t do something because they don’t have the skills, abilities, physical traits, blah, blah, blah – or –because they have always been stuck in a certain typecast, position, industry, blah, blah, blah – I think of Frank.
Frank is the epitome of no boundaries.
Here are a few things about Frank:
He is a world-class Olympic Athlete.
He hit on Natalie Cole.
He was pretty much told by Stevie Wonder once not to sing his song on an elevator (great story).
He is a former DJ and Bouncer.
He is a poet.
He is an inspirational speaker.
He is a highly sought after ballroom dancer.
He is an ADA Employment Consultant at a major university.
He’s a chick magnet – just ask any of his male friends.
And he is just getting started…
He has never seen himself in a box or only as one type of person, job, task, performance. He makes a determination to try something new and off he goes with boundless energy. Shortly thereafter we begin to get a stream on Facebook about how is accomplishing this task.
He inspires me because he refused to be classified, stop reinventing himself, giving of himself to others and appreciate every opportunity whether it presented itself to him or he had to knock the door down to go get it.
When I think I can’t – I think of Frank. I don’t know that can’t exists in his vocabulary. Having someone like this in my life keeps my personal environment nothing short of positive. So no matter what is going on in my personal or professional life, he is always there as a supporter, inspiration and source of complete positive energy.
It is because of my support system that my personal environment is fun, full of energy, inspiration, accountability, excitement, joy and love. With this type of environment any hurdle isn’t a monumental task, it is merely a challenge that my friends encourage me to conquer.
Oh, and one more thing about Frank: he was born with a condition that resulted in him being a wheelchair user for life.
Lisa K. McDonald, CPRW