You know how people with more than one child talk about their kids like, “Susie is my little angel, she gets straight As, lettered in every sport, has a job, volunteers at the shelter and still does all her chores without me asking. Betsy is my other child….”
I had one child by birth, that child is that ‘other child’. He is intelligent, charming, empathetic, caring, funny, kind, giving, brave, with a strong sense of honor – he is also sarcastic, bullheaded, argumentative, stubborn, impulsive and never saw trouble that didn’t have his name on it.
That one gave me grey hair, sleepless nights, weight loss and many moments of questioning my sanity. I love that boy. The picture above is his – dare I say – sarcastic “I don’t want to get my picture taken and this is my forced happy smile just for mom!” smile. Yeah, love that boy. I don’t know where he gets that sarcasm.
One day when he was a teenager – his most challenging period – he was being quite the horse’s patootie. I had enough for one day, looked at him and said, “Child, I love you more than life itself – yet right now I do not like you very much. You need to go away from me.”
Needless to say this threw him a bit. He responded with, “You’re my mom, you’re supposed to like me.”
I explained that no, that was not a requirement and that you can love someone but not like them all the time. If they are being disrespectful, argumentative and just a plain jackass then no, you are not required to like them just because you love them. Just like when I would put the hammer down on rules, he did not like me at that time.
It is okay not to like your kid every now and then. It does not mean you are a bad parent or failing.
My mom once told me God makes them teenagers so you want them out of the house. True, so true – at least in our instance. There are moments that I am more proud of that boy than anything it overwhelms me; and then there are times that I understand why in the wild they eat their young.
It is a relationship and with most relationships there are ups and downs. The lasting, meaningful relationships are not always filled with rainbows, sunshine and lollipops – there are moments in between the joy and happiness that are ‘what they heck was I thinking’ moments and ‘if I drove to another state, would anyone come looking for me and make me come back?’
Your job is a relationship. It has the same ups and downs as any other relationship. There are days that you love it, could not imagine doing anything else. Then there are days that you wondered how you got sucked into this vortex of darkness.
It is okay not to like your job every now and then. It does not mean it is a bad job or you are in the wrong place.
If you are thinking about leaving your current position, you need to stop and ask yourself where you are in the animal kingdom. Are you in a temporary phase of relating to the new male alpha lion chomping on helpless lion cubs -or- are you the circus elephant that has been chained up his entire life?
Is this a temporary phase or a consistent pattern? Do not throw away stability or, for the most part, a happy relationship because of a temporary phase. Deciding to leave your job is a big decision, do not make it irrationally based on a bad day or week. Those pass and you have the ability to lessen them and make them better. Do you really need to own this bad day? Isn’t there enough good that you can just let it go for today?
Remind yourself that is okay not to like your job every once in a while, it helps you appreciate the overwhelming amount of good that is there the rest of the time. You will love it again tomorrow, once you get a little space.
As the Founder and Principle of Career Polish, Inc., a national career coaching and practice firm, I am an Executive Brand Strategist, Resume Writer and Career Coach. I work with individual clients, companies, leadership and teams to identify, strengthen and effectively communicate their brand, engagement, commitment and most importantly – their value – by learning and leveraging LinkedIn, resumes, networking, communication, relationship management, presence and influence.
I help people get from where they are in their jobs to where they want to be in their careers.
Click here – CareerPolish.com – to find out more about how we can help you.